Wednesday, May 28, 2008

A day in the life of a doctor

It is not a very good or joyful month for us, there is a touch of sadness akin for the month. First we celebrate the life of Butch CASTILLO on his birthday. A great loss to the organization as he was one of the founding member. Then we loss a senior adviser, our beloved Dr. Florencio Molejon. So for the end of the month, here is an entry to put a little smile on our face. Tidbits in a life of a doctor. Unfortunately, it is not from the local setting but it is funny. Some of us could probably identify with some of the stories, and perhaps your story is even funnier than these stories. Again, this is just to lighten up the month a little bit.

1. A man came into the ER and yelled, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs -and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX.

2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. "Big breaths," I instructed. "Yes, they used to be," replied the patient. Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA

3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a "massive internal fart." Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada

4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications. "Which one?" I asked. "The patch. The nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it!" I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now, the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one. Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair, Norfolk, VA

5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have you been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered..."Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive." Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR

6. I was caring for a woman and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste" the patient replied. I then asked to! see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly." Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI

7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green,and above it there was a tattoo that read, "Keep off the grass." Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said, "Sorry, had to mow the lawn. Submitted by RN no name

8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams. To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?" She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was, "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener". Dr. wouldn't submit his name.

( i saw this in an issue of Reader's Digest awhile back, but i forgot the issue. i saw it again today in an email, i decide to post it here to share a laugh . hope you'll enjoy it as I do.)

agp

Thursday, May 15, 2008

So many are called . . .

... We started off in large number, with mixed feelings
and unending questions of " is this for real".

... Cold-clamy hands plague, always came on friday and monday
mornings witnessed shaking knees and abducted shoulders.

... We had nightmares: the images we saw were vivid even with
closed eyes and the words we heard were clear even with shut ears

... pain and more pain felt, blocks came hurtling down,
the whole event saturated with the salt of our tears.

... We learned somewhere, one time that our pain is the breaking
of the shell that encloses our understanding

... We stock to our litany of " when the race seems lost
and the pain is too much, don't quit".

... After the heavy downpour, the sun smiled and shone
brightly once more, to feed the soul and the mind.

... it has been an exhausting and bewildering experience,
more painful than pleasurable, more sad than happy,
but we won't trade it for the world.

... and yes, but few were chosen".

by: Rhuena Cablayan
for: ESPRIT DE CORPS and NE PLUS ULTRA

August 30, 1986

Foundation Anniversary
HYATT Regency Manila

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mothers day...


TO ALL MOTHERS:


SIS OR OTHER WISE .....

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Dorothy Canfield Fisher

Mothers hold their children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Unknown

Men are what their mothers made them. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Ralph Waldo Emerson

We never know the love of the parent until we become parents ourselves. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Henry Ward Beecher

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Honore de Balzac, author

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Lin Yutang, Chinese writer

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. Inspirational Quotes on Mothers Day by: Tenneva Jordan

Greetings from a mom:

To all my Brothers and Sisters: Wishing you all a very happy mother's day. Been out of town for a while attending some conventions, na late ang greetings ko sa mga beautiful and wonderful mommies. I also have a friendster site so if you happen to have one please add me http://profiles.friendster.com/milalibiranisidromd

Godspeed!!!! !

atemiles

When Doctors meet. . .

WHEN a panel of doctors was asked to vote on adding a new wing to their hospital:-

The allergists voted to scratch it and the dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The gastroenterologists had a sort of gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve, and the obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.

The ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted, the pathologists said, `over my dead body', while the paediatricians said, `Oh, grow up!' The psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, the radiologists could see right through it, and the surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

The internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the plastic surgeons said, `This puts a whole new face on the matter'. The podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the urologists felt the scheme wouldn't hold water. The anaesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and the cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the proctologists left the decision up to some asshole in administration

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

The 4th Foundation Night

The following was a taken from MEDICUS NEWSLETTER published in 1986. It described the 4th Foundation Night Activities, written by our Sis Ma. Carmen Edaugal.

Dressed in their best formale and nicest smiles, everyone came anticipating a truly unforgettable night. The brods were all dashing as the sis were all gorgeous. As if it was a Golden Globe Awards Affair, rather, a FAMAS Night (let's patronize our own !)

The whole affair was video-taped and Cris and Bobby tried their very best to be seen in video most of the time but I think, Monette instructed the cameraman to focus only the "focusable". The successful one was Ronald "McDo" de Ramos, who snatched the view for sometime as he recited the Medicus Creed after Rochi Marcelo lead the singing of the National Anthem. The opening remarks was given by the OC of the Sorority, Jennifer Sy and the introduction of the guest, Dean Quito was done by the OC of the Fraternity, Art Onglao. The affair was excellently emceed by Au Fabian and Rhoderick Poblete who made a great pair as their attires complemented very well.

The Sampaguita Hall of the Hyatt was full of cigarette smoke before Dean Quito spoke. But when the Dean, during her very inspiring talk, mentioned how obvious it was that she failed in her anti -smoking campaign, everybody put off their lighted cigarettes except for one whom I've seen. (don't worry, Manny, I won't tell her).

The message of the founding members given by Brod Angel C. Araneta was very touching and reminiscent of the past Medicus Nights and this was followed by the award giving (ala Grammy). Plaques were given to the recipients of the Best Neophyte Award: (Soro) Ma. Cecilia Cuevas and (Frat) Diosdado Limjoco and the Most Outstanding Dominus Award: (Soro) Ma Carmen Edaugal and (Frat) Hassan Irshaid. Certificate of Merit were also given to those who haven't had any abscences during the meetings last year. And since Cris Gonzales was one of the awardees, he had the chance to show his (once in a blue moon) dashing form over the cameras. The Best Dressed Award, the most exciting of the awards and which included cash rewards was given to Araceli Loyola and Bethuel Curameng.

The Unang Hirit Raffle Draw was also held during the night and it was Dean Quito who drew the winning tickets. The said raffle was a very successful fund-raising project organized by Monette Soriano and Manny Sunga.

An indeed delightful part of the affair was the slide projection and of the pictures of the past Medicus Activities. It was exciting to have seen those captures happy moments and candid poses of our brods and sis. Another winsome part was the intermission number rendered by the MEDICUS Band composed by: Gilbert Quimosing, Elvis Verso, Ronald Fetalvero, Archie Lumibao, and singers Ricky Dela Cruz and Roderick Poblete. They sounded like professionals (passion readers? of course not). And the sorority had their own share of talents and breath taking at that. By exhibiting their graceful dancing forms, they caught everybody in awe. The dancers were; Jen Sy, Grace Salamanca, Au Fabian, Mary Ann Chua, Tina Fernandez and Maureen Flores.

The intermission number of the new batch: Ne Plus Ultra and Esprit De Corps was a special treat, truly exciting. And if the others would permit, I should say incomparable (take note Vincula). What with a Babette Villaruel as guest whom nobody recognized and imagined to be the genius looking and serious type - Noel Perez. Everybody almost died laughing at the antics of Marissa Ruffy and Alex Santos who played Elvira Manahan and Kuya Ceasar, respectively. They did not forget to thank their bar host, Gold Mountain and the waiter, Simon as played by Celso Demaala. The Village People: Manny de Lara, Alvin Santos, Jojo San Gabriel, Jun Solis, and Roderick Poblete would have left a Macho image if not for a deviation to very feminine steps when the refrain of the YMCA was played. When Rhuena Cablayan with a very big cross pendant and with very dark shades came out on the stage, no one doubted that she was playing Madonna. But when Dado Limjoco suddenly entered with raised brows, exposed navel and wild dancing, it took some time before tha audience guessed that he was playing Boy George. He looked more like a member of the Kiss Band. On the other hand when Joli Frias came out on a tight fitting, strikingly colored, satin pants, everybody's guess was correct - Imelda Papin. Arnel Bondoc amusingly commented, "madudulas and langaw sa pants niya". Two very healthy sisters, Tess Chan and Doree Villamar played scintillating roles as Dona Delaila and Dona Buding, respectively. Finally, the skit ended with a song from a pregnant Pops played by Aracely Loyola and Martin, played by Norman de Leon. Other members not included in the skit presented a dance number. moreover Rochi marcelo and Zuphia Alcaide rendered a duet.

The highlight of the event was of course the Final Acceptance of the Ne Plus Ultra and Esprit De Corps. It was a very solemn and touching event where each of the new members were symbolically accepted by the pinning to them of their Medicus Pins.

At around 12 midnight, the dancing started and that's another story. . . I don't wish to squeal secrets revealed during the dancing specially during the romantic, sweet, slow dance. MEDICUS people are truly love-susceptive creatures, Oh well . . .

Written By:

Maria Carmen Edaugal 1986